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Stop being interestING, start being interestED
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Tatyana is an amazingly talented mortgage loan officer I've coached in the past. She had this to say to me once, about the referral question I taught you last week: "I had a green light conversation with a realtor today. It went extremely well and I learned what they liked about the lenders they've used, and what they didn't like about the lenders they've worked with in the past. Turns out the referral partners moved away and we were scheduled to have lunch next week." That's what it's all about. It opened the door. Now, is a referral guaranteed? No. Of course not. But she asked a question that's moved her into position to have a more detailed conversation with somebody. That's WAY farther than most people get. So what happens when you ask a question that gets you to a one-on-one meeting? Before you go shock-and-aweing them with your offerings, I want you to remember this little phrase: "The quality of your life will be proportionate to the quality of questions you ask of yourself, and of others." Be interested when you're one-on-one with someone. Not interesting. What does that mean? Listen. (Quick exercise: Write down the word "Listen." Now come up with another word using the same letters. What is it? SILENT. So listen, and be silent.) But not too silent. Ask questions. Quality questions. If you're going to build a business around gratitude, curiosity, and generosity...questions are part and parcel of that. Curiosity a mindset. But it's also a practice. And if you're going to put curiosity into practice, you've got to have some good go-to questions to ask people. Here are a few to jumpstart your thought process:
Notice anything about these questions? They're all 'what' and 'how'. Not a 'why' in sight. One of the best sales books I've ever read is by an FBI negotiator, it's called Never Split the Difference. In there he talks about 'what' and 'how' questions. Focus on using those. Not 'why' questions. So for instance, when you ask someone the greenlight referral question and they say somebody else's name, how do you respond? "What do you like about them?" Not "Why do you like them?" See the difference? It seems subtle, but it's actually quite big. So what curious, quality questions do you have in your arsenal? Start grabbing ones you like and put them to use! Until next time, Brian Whenever you're ready, there are 2 ways I can help you:
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