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How not to let "what-ifs" stop you
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Hey Reader, isn't being afraid of success a funny thing? Success is simultaneously the thing we want most and the thing we fear most when we're on trajectory to get it. This concept of fear of success recently crept into a client's life. He's part of our Boardroom, and over the past 6 months he's seen exponential growth in his business just by doing some of the things we regularly talk about here. He was recently at a conference and someone—who he'd known for awhile—came up to him and said "Man, I've been watching what you're doing and we need to talk. We'd like you to be our nationwide provider." So he set up a time for them to get together and talk about it. Dream come true, right? Mmm...not really. Because as soon as he scheduled the appointment, fear of success started to creep in. He started thinking about all the things that could happen if this came to fruition. All the things that could happen, and all the things that could go wrong. Basically, allllll the "what-ifs". So here's an exercise he found really useful... (Check out the video for more, or read on below...) Quick side note. Dale Carnegie says... “Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.” So what do you do when there's not really even anything to get "in action" about yet? Turn those paralyzing, anxiety-inducing "what-ifs" into action. So back to the exercise. We had him write out all his concerns—all his "what ifs"—on a piece of paper. 😨 What if _______________ happens?! 😨 What if I drop the ball on something?! 😨 What if I'm overwhelmed with new orders?! Once all his "what-ifs" where out there, we had him cross out the "what-ifs" and replace them with "Even ifs." 🧠 Even if _______________ happens, I'll handle it by _______________. 🧠 Even if I drop the ball on something, I'll handle it by _______________. 🧠 Even if I'm overwhelmed with new orders, I'll handle it by _______________. Turning "what-ifs" into action. Ruminating on what-ifs gets you paralyzed. Figuring out how you'd respond to the "even-ifs" gets you confident and energized. This lets you lean into pursuing great opportunities wholeheartedly, instead of being paralyzed by fear (or even self-sabotaging) because you're not sure how you're going to handle the ups-and-downs that might come with it. Fear of success is a real thing, and it happens to us all! If you need more help, Gay Hendricks wrote a great book called The Big Leap where he talks about this topic and conquering your Upper Limit Problem. So there's a little resource for you but if I can do anything for you, I'm here to help too. Brian 1:1 help, only 2 spots!Reader, have you been wanting to build a (better) business on referrals? I'm testing out a new thing for people in other industries that I usually only offer to mortgage professionals. It's called Referrals Without Asking. And since I'm testing it, 2 lucky people are going to get its $497 value for nothing. Interested? It's a private, 90-minute 1:1 session with me where you'll walk away with:
Remember, there are only 2 slots available on October 3rd...you can snag yours here. |
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Hi Reader, wanted to share a quick story from a client. He's had some success building a referral-based business. But he's also struggled building referral partner relationships. We were going through his relationships and trying to pinpoint where the best opportunities would be. Here are a couple of things we uncovered. And we did it by tapping into a little acronym I learned from my good friend, John Ruhlin. John would always say, "Look for R.I.C.H. relationships." Here's what it stands...
Ever do something (or not do something) even though you know better, Reader? I did that once. (Well, let's be real...it wasn't the first time, and won't be the last time. 😂) You see, I teach a little something called The Greenlight Question. It's a way to find out how likely someone is to refer people to you. In a no-pressure, non-awkward way. More of a conversation, than a sales pitch. Below, I talk about a time a boofed things up by not asking it when I should have. I was hosting an event...
Hey Reader, how much are you giving? Referrals, that is. That's the same question I asked a newer client recently who was talking out some referability woes with me: "Well if you don't mind me asking, how many referrals are you giving?" He just looked kind of puzzled and said, "Well, I'm trying to get referrals." My response? "I know, but how many are you giving?" You see, not only is giving referrals the best way to get them... ...But it's also the best way to get unstuck. You know, unstuck...